10 Home Date Ideas

Honestly, this post has been on my draft for who knows how long, but my embarassment is nowhere to be found right now so might as well post it, right? HAHA

Have you ever wondered what Jem and I do during our idle days? Probably not, cause we're not really a bunch of celebrities or someone for that matter. But still, I decided to post some of our usual stuff just for the sake of it!

Staycation at Bellini Suites

I can't believe I always let time pass before posting stuff here on my blog! Anyway, to get back on track, I'm scheduled to post 2 updates that was supposed to be for the year of 2017. So to start off, I'll just post the last adventure Jem and I did before ending 2017 with our respective families ;)

From South to North: Laguna, Rizal, and Antipolo!

Another long overdue post, as usual.

So anyway, back in August (wow, this post is like 3 months late HAHA) Jem and I decided on heading out for a quick getaway from the city life. Since we didn't really have a large amount of money and only have limited time, we decided on heading back to Kaliraya Surf Kamp for some outdoor adventure!

Diary Entry: August 31, 2017

I've been inactive for a while now because I don't really have something worthwhile to talk about (or so I feel) but I guess I needed to let this one out even if it will just be here. It's been one complete week since I went out to seek assistance somewhere in Rosario, Pasig.

I was scheduled for a quick, which turned to a long, meeting last August 31 since it was the only opening the person I was meeting had. I called to schedule a meeting probably 3 weeks before that date so that's how in demand she was. Typically, I would have chickened out the last minute, but because of the support I received and how the logical side of my brain coaxed me in continuing, I entered and waited inside her little, homey office.

I found out about her with the help of a very close friend who asked another friend of ours. I was hesitant on calling the number given to me, thinking that I might end up wasting both her and my time by dropping by. Hours passed before I finally gave in and dialed her number using the phone inside our tiny, yellow office. Her secretary answered on the third ring and asked me a few questions and informed me of the next open schedule. I confirmed for an afternoon meeting on August 31; conveniently, it was our pay day and the start of another long weekend.

A day before my schedule, I asked my manager if I can take the day off due to medical reasons. He didn't ask anymore than that and agreed. I slept at Jem's house the night before since I needed to take care of another thing early in the morning. We probably only had 3-4 hours of sleep because we were talking 'till late at night.

Morning came and we both got ready. Him for his duty in UST Hospital and me for my big day ahead. After finishing my agenda in UST, I quickly headed to her office. I felt the drum of my heart with every step I take to get to my destination and the cold sweat that ran down the line of my back. I was scared. Then all of a sudden, I was already in front of her office. Sitting on a black plump sofa. Already waiting for my turn.

I texted Jem that I wanted out but he insisted that I should go since I was already there. He sent me supportive messages and I left it at that since I know he too was busy with his duty. When I felt that my knees were turning weak and my hands were sweating profusely, I stepped out and decided to eat at a nearby food stall to calm my nerves.

I returned right after and waited patiently for my name to be called. Since I was scheduled after her lunch break, I was able to take a short nap on her very comfy sand-colored sofa. There were a number of people waiting like me when I opened my eyes. Not long after, she came out of her office with a stack of folders in hand and called for my name.

"de Leon? Justine de Leon?" she announced.
I got up, "Yes po," I said. She smiled and ushered me inside her office.

Her office was filled with natural light. Really, the artificial ones didn't really help at all. There was a big book shelf on one side with a space that serves as her table and two big sofas situated on the middle back of the room. Between them was a brown coffee table. I couldn't help but look around her spacious office and observe every single detail because I needed to calm my steel nerves.

She gestured for me to sit down and she followed suit.
"So," she started, "how can I help you, Justine?"
An incomprehensible sound came out of my mouth followed by a short, embarrassed laugh.
"I honestly don't know where to start..." I replied.

But even after saying that, I was able to open up to her. My woes and all the negative thoughts I had clamped up inside. We probably talked more than what time let me feel. I walked out of her office after an hour with 2 prescription papers on my hand. One with 3 copies since she told me that pharmacists are heavily strict on that particular medicine.

I was diagnosed with depression.

And I have to take 2 prescription medicines to help me. Along with the feeling of depression, anxiety and panic attacks are very common so these two are also being addressed by the medicines given to me.

I've been taking my medicines for the past 6 days. The first time I took it, I felt like my head had weights attached to it. Not long after I took it, I was dead asleep on my bed. I was woken up the following morning by our dog, Aina, jumping on me. That was the longest sleep I had for the past few months. Before, I usually wake up in the early morning hours, usually around 3AM and get back to sleep by 5AM.

I searched for the side effects of the medicines I'm taking and mostly it says that I'll be feeling sleepy. Indeed I feel sleepy for the entire day. Thankfully I don't feel tired at all but just really, really sleepy.

Since it's only going to be a week since I started taking my medicines, I haven't really felt any changes with my psyche lol but hopefully, soon I'll be seeing any.

I'm scheduled for a follow-up this coming September 30 so I guess that's something I kind of look forward to.

'Till then!

Journey to Central Luzon: 3D2N Bataan Trip

A very long overdue post!

Jem and I had been visiting various places during the month of June since Jem's duty was scheduled to start on July 1. Yes, my baby is already a clerk! *huhu so proud* anyway, so for our #hulinghurit, we've decided on visiting the historical province of Bataan!

Mt. Samat, Bataan

Laresio Lakeside: Resort for the Adrenaline Junkies!

Every once in a while, Jem and I look for some sort of activity which would pump some of our stored adrenaline; like watching a suspense film (mostly I do it alone) or going to the amusement park. This time we decided on visiting one of the rising destinations in Laguna, Laresio Lakeside Resort & Spa!

From Sur to Norte: 3D2N Ilocos Trip (Pt. 2)

For the second day of our stay in Ilocos, we woke up pretty early since our first stop would be the northernmost part of Ilocos, none other than Pagudpud!

From Sur to Norte: 3D2N Ilocos Trip (Pt. 1)

Even before the start of Jem's last vacation, we've been planning on going all out on our trips. Because of this, we listed down the top places we wanted to visit before the start of his clerkship (shout out: CONGRATULATION JEMBOY! HUHU SO PROUD OF YOU! NEVER DOUBTED IT FOR A SECOND!) *ehem* so anyway, for our first trip for the month of June, we went to explore the region of Ilocos!

Weekend Warriors at Mt. Batolusong, Rizal

So I was feeling down for the past couple of months and I needed to find a way to channel out all my negative thoughts and transform it into something useful. I thought, "what better way to distract my pessimistic mind by tiring itself out, right?". So on May 26, I posted an invite to my Facebook friends if they're up for a day hike at Mount Batolusong, Tanay, Rizal!

Shopping Centers in Singapore

I felt like this post took soooo long but anyway, here we are again! This will be my last installment about our trip to Singapore. For every trip, may it be local or international, what we eventually look for are the places where we can buy some pasalubong for our very expectant family and friends. This has been engraved within our culture and I don't think this is going anywhere anytime soon.

CHINATOWN!

A Day at Resorts World Sentosa

For the 2nd day of our stay in Singapore, we decided that we'll just spend it mostly inside Sentosa. Along with the plane tickets and the hotel accommodations, the raffle also included a free pass to three of Resorts World's attractions; Adventure Cove, S.E.A. Aquarium, and of course, Universal Studios!

Sightseeing in Singapore

As what I have said on my previous post, getting around Singapore will be the least of your worries because of their highly efficient subway system (wish it could also be implemented here in the country). So days ahead, I have researched everything I needed to know about this transportation system. The key to saving as much money as you can while going around this country is to avoid taking taxis and ride their trains (plus you also get to experience how the daily lives of Singaporeans is like!).

SMRT train

de Leons' goes International!

Travelling had always been my passion. I could say that I see this as my escape from the daily routine of waking up early to head to the office, and spend most of my day there, before wrapping things up to go home. So the moment we learned that my tita was picked as one of the lucky winners of Jollibee's raffle, I knew I would never let this opportunity go down the drain!

View of Resorts World Sentosa from the Sentosa BoardWalk

Overnight Stay at Kaliraya Surf Kamp

Weeks ahead, Jem and I had been planning on going to Potipot Island in Zambales for an overnight stay. We were supposed to do this during the super long weekend but since we no longer had the budget and time, we decided on roughing it out on nearby provinces instead.

I was wearing shorts, I swear :))

Quick Trip to the North: San Felipe, Zambales

Having the Philippines host the 30th ASEAN Summit was not only a blessing for the Philippine government but also to Manileños and Manileñas. Having to suspend work and class for a Friday and having another holiday come Monday next week means a SUPER LONG WEEKEND we all crave for!

Basking in the beauty of the sunset

SUMMER IS HERE: 3D2N Stay at Cagbalete Island

We've all been busy for the last few months and I know everyone is looking forward for the most awaited season, next to Christmas, summer!

Over the past few weeks, Manila had succumbed to the mind numbing heat brought about by the summer season. So what can a good ol' Manileña like me can do? What else but to retreat to nearby provinces to relax and unwind, of course!

The beautiful Cagbalete Sandbar ;)

Not a Bunch of Photographers, just 2 Hobbyist!

Since Jem and I had been doing some random photowalks for the past few months, little did I know that my aunt would notice it and actually ask us to be the photographers for their mini photoshoot!

By the second week of March, my aunt approached me and asked me to assist them along with Jem (since he was the owner of the camera HAHA). The photoshoot was scheduled on March 25, Saturday, at the La Mesa Eco Park located somewhere in Novaliches, Quezon City. I informed Jem about this and he immediately agreed.

Still, I warned my aunt that we are just a bunch of hobbyist! Still learning the ropes of photography through Google and some guidance from our photographer friends.

Meet Our New Family Member

I've always wanted to have a living, breathing pet ever since I was small. Too bad my mom doesn't like the idea of taking care of another living, breathing something aside from me. I think it was because I already was too much to handle :)) Whenever I asked for one though, she always compensated by buying me fishes. All throughout my childhood we had a small aquarium inside our house. I guessed we stopped having one when my mom realized that it was still quite high maintenance (my mom is like that).

Luckily though, the place we live in is infested by cute, little cats. We had a number of unofficial pet cats when I was a child. There was Lucas (which I don't remember why I named him that way), then Ming-Ming (which we later placed on a box along with her numerous kittens, she's quite a whore LOL, and placed in an abandoned land... I was crying the whole time), then Mary who all of the sudden stopped dropping by our house, and now we have Garfield, the chillest unofficial house cat we ever had.

We had another development though. My aunt's friend offered her a free puppy last month and we happily agreed to take it home! I was sooo excited to meet it that I kept asking her every Sunday (it was her church-mate) if where the puppy was. Then on one fateful Sunday as I was doing our laundry, my aunt called from somewhere as she was walking home. And on her arms was a tiny, brown, SUPER CUTE puppy!!!

Not Ready

Guess I'm back again with another travel-unrelated post. Or anything-exciting post.

I honestly started blogging because I was looking for a medium to express my thoughts and emotions. I am not a very social person; like, seriously, NOT a very social person. I don't even consider myself on the level 1 of being a social person; so imagine what I feel when all my frustrations builds up inside. Anyway, I'm writing this post now because I might have come face to face with something I am totally not ready for. It started on this day, Sunday of March 2017.

As always, Jem and I planned our day ahead. We were supposed to meet up at EDSA - P. Tuazon so we could travel back to their condo and engage in our weekly gym routine. Prior to that, I was supposed to do our weekly laundry. But after waking up at 9 in the morning, my body kept on telling me to sleep the day off and to not go outside... I instantly thought of my previous breakdown but immediately brushed it off thinking that it was probably just my laziness acting up again.

But then my head started aching. Both of my temples began pounding as if syncing with a tune I couldn't hear. Then it got worse. The ache encircled the back of my head and all I could think of was the pain I was feeling.

I immediately told my mom I couldn't do our laundry and she told me that she'll just do it herself, albeit it would only be their clothes. A bit disappointed since I will still have to do my own laundry, I got back to my room and laid down, thinking that a bit of rest would make this headache go away. At around quarter to 12, Jem pinged me on FB telling me he wouldn't be able to fetch me at our meet-up place since his mom asked him to register her on one of Nike's weekly run. I wasn't able to reply since my mom called me down to eat our lunch.

Still thinking that this headache of mine would disappear after I fill up my empty stomach, I hungrily munched on my home-cooked special mongo that my step-father prepared. Since I started feeling that the pounding on my head began fading, I decided to head out and go to Jem's condo. I booked a Grab Car since it was already a bit late and I didn't want to commute under the scorching heat.

The moment I stepped on their condo, I felt that my headache returned, and much, much worse. I told Jem that my head was pounding and he apparently offered me to take some meds but I didn't hear him. We went straight to the gym after fixing some of our stuff and began our cardio. With every exercise, the pounding in my head started getting stronger and stronger. After our warm-up, I felt like all of my blood traveled up to my brain as if helping to increase the pounding that was already too painful to handle. Jem settled me on one of the gym equipment and ushered me to rest instead.

I tried my best to take even just a short nap so I can free myself from the pain even for just a short while but I wasn't able to. I got up after 30-40 minutes or so (it was only after that that I was able to move) and told Jem that I'll just be lying outside near the swimming pool, thinking that the fresh air would help me. Jem finished his routine for another 10-15 minutes before going to me and helping me up. I actually needed his support. as well as the walls', so I could walk to the elevator.

When we got back to their condo, he gave me a paracetamol and asked me to wash up so that I could feel refreshed. Release my body from the heat, per se. After washing up, I hastily tried to dry my hair and lied down to catch some sleep, as he instructed me to.

I felt him lie next to me after a few minutes and I snuggled to him as I tried to get back to sleeping while he was reading some reviewer on his phone. It was a restless sleep and I didn't feel refreshed after it. When we woke up (he fell asleep too after reviewing for 10 minutes), we cuddled and talked about random things and I still felt like my head was about to burst in half. I don't exactly know what triggered it but then I suddenly began feeling extremely sad. I tried searching for a reason as to why but came up with nothing. I felt my throat lock up and felt a scream wanting to come out... then I cried. Then I had another panic attack.

Jem shushed me and comforted me all throughout. Then I realized what was wrong. Why I suddenly felt sad even when I was lying next to the person I consider most important to me. I felt scared... thinking back, I was already feeling this way days, weeks even, ahead. I've had this constant dream of Jem leaving me for another woman he met on one of his duties on the hospital. Then it got worse when I wasn't only dreaming about it (something I couldn't control) but I was thinking, imaging even, it (something that I should be able to control). I honestly felt scared of our future. Our relationship. Him leaving me. Me, being too dependent on him. Every little thing that would involved the two of us. I started imagining how would our stuff be divided when we broke up, because most of it are things that we bought 50/50. I started imagining seeing him years ahead, after our supposed break up, with another woman and me single acting as if everything was okay. The lowest I got was when I started thinking that he was cheating on me even though he had never given me a reason to feel that way... I felt worse when I realized that even I myself can't control my thoughts. I know he's a great man but my mind kept perverting his image. Telling me that he has an ugly side. Someone I haven't even seen or met. My own mind was contorting the image of the person I love into some monster that I would hate. As if telling me to save myself from a future full of heartache and pain even though he hadn't even given me a reason to feel that way. All this time he treated me like his equal. Something he would always protect. Treating me the way he treats himself; with respect and love...

So I told him. He was silent for the most part but right after it he encouraged me with words that I have always heard from him. He had told me daily that he loves me and that it would never change. But somehow it always feel like it was the first time I hear that from him. I felt glad that he understood and he didn't scoffed at me. That he didn't think I was only being dramatic. I felt glad that he was honestly worried about me. He assured me, like always, that his feelings wouldn't change. But still, we have to work together for our relationship to flourish and last.

I started calming down. But my headache was still there. Then he told me. That what I fear most was probably already happening. My headache was not caused by some biological thing (skipping meals, not getting enough sleep, etc) but by something psychological.

I was already assuming I have it but kept on telling myself that I was probably just on the dramatic side of the human spectrum. But with the pattern of constant worry of something that is not immediate. Something that is not there. Then the constant feeling of restlessness. Not being able to focus when feeling worried about something I imagined. Episodic headaches on the same location of the head which sometimes reaches the eyes and makes it blurry. The panic attacks. The episodic feeling of difficulty in breathing...

He suggested that I should go talk to the psychiatrist I know. Just so I could get a clear answer if I really am suffering with anxiety. I might go this week. Or maybe the next. Or maybe when I feel ready. I don't know. I'm already feeling anxious thinking about it...

Photography and Travel Enthusiasts, UNITE!

Nowadays, lakwatseras (or travelers, for a kinder term HAHA) are more in tuned in producing not just selfies, but what most people call as 'artsy' shots. Of course this is already achievable with whatever camera you got; may it be your smartphone, your trusted sports cam, or what have you. As long as you got the right place, the right angle.

But there's just this something that makes you want to produce an output that is more than just for posting on your IG feed. And this can be achieved if you have more freedom of control on your device. So you can remove or lessen that annoying glare of the sun on your artsy shot, so that the sharpness of the mountains on the distance will be prominent, so that the waves of the ocean will have that realistic texture that you oh-so-crave for... Yeah, yeah post processing is a thing, but what if you can produce that same result with just a raw shot, right?

Yes, SLRs and DSLRs has been on market for the past millennia (exaggeration, I know), but not everyone has the time to learn its technicalities and the money to purchase a good one. Good thing mirror-less cameras had made its niche on the market!

Mirror-less Cameras (image from here)