An Update

So I have updated my bucket list with a list of restaurants I want to visit for at least once. But! I haven't even accomplished one from my original list!

I was about to tick off this one yesterday:

• Buy my Mom something she'd like (for once).

But yeah, I wasn't able to because I decided to no longer claim the prize I won from our bidding which is this. Why, you ask? Because my shift starts at 8AM and ends at 5PM and they decided to release the prizes at 6PM with so many other requirements to accomplish. I already had to stay at our office and render overtime due to the report that we were required to send!

So no checks from the list for now. Hopefully by this coming Tuesday I'll be able to tick that one off cause it's my mother's 50th birthday.

Bucket List (For the Year 2015)

So I decided that I will make an official bucket list that I must, with all my power, accomplish by the end of this year. Below is the list of things I want to do (alone or with my friends or with my significant other).

*This is an on-going list, so I might add some more. Maybe a few days or weeks from now ;)

• Visit these 10 Modern Art Museums that can be found on this link.
• Climb Taal Volcano! (because I wasn't able to come with my friends #sad)
• Visit the beach *with optional bonfire.
• Have a picnic at some park somewhere.
• Hiking & Camping! *bonfire required.
• Get drunk (LOL, easy one)
• Eat at a high-end restaurant *completely dolled up (here, even for just one resto!)
• Outing with College Friends           ----- Kinda hard to do
• Outing with High school Friends    ----- Kinda hard to do
• Buy my Mom something she'd like (for once).
• Buy myself at least 3 pairs of Vans shoes :)
• Stay at a nice hotel.
• ROAD TRIP!
• Watch at all the cinemas listed here.
• Play some live music somewhere/anywhere.
• Complete a lazy day (watch movies, eat pizza, drink beer).

PS

I'll be posting everything I accomplish here on my blog, so stay tuned! 

Self explanatory

posted from Bloggeroid

Explaining feelings is feeling...

Explaining what you're feeling to other people will be one of the hardest things you will be doing in your life time.

Our vocabulary simply lacks the words to use in order to express and explain what you are truly feeling.

Recently, I've tried sharing what I am going through. And it wasn't enough. I wasn't able to properly convey my message that can be easily summarized into: I'm sad and depressed.

Whenever we express what we feel, we as humans, tend to follow up the statement with the question why. That leads us to suddenly thinking that we should be able to justify what we are feeling. And it's just that not easy.

For one, feeling depressed sometimes strips you out of the right words you want to say. Just like how it strips you out of energy to do things, like eat three times a day.

I understand that we need some sort of validation as to our feelings so that whoever wants to help us will know the cause and in turn, the most reasonable resolution. But we must also understand how limited our medium of communication is. As what most of us say, not everything can be put into words.

posted from Bloggeroid

Wonderwall (noun)

A barrier which separates the mundane from the Transcendent Reality. A true Wonderwall will always have a crack, or a slit or an opening which allows anyone a glimpse of what lies beyond the Wonderwall.

Again...

It's back.
I'm starting to feel it again...But now that I think about it, I don't think this feeling actually went away. Maybe, maybe it just hid itself for a long time. Hidden itself so to allow me to enjoy my life as it is for a few weeks, a few months. And now, it re-surfaced. Ever so slowly chipping away the pieces that I tried so hard to put back together.

**DISCLAIMER:We all handle problems differently.

Thoughts from the past year and of everyday of my life

I sometimes wonder if you do really care.

Cause I do. I fucking do.

Sometimes I want to tell you things. But you know me, right? I can't always do that. You, of all people should know that that would feel like sucking away a few minutes of my life. I want to tell you, I do. But I tend to get scared. I freaking get scared. That it will be too much. That I will be too much. For you. That you'll get sick of this little girl that I actually am.

That's why I have other ways where I can let my feelings out. Where I can let my thoughts fly freely.

I found my medium and I am continuously exposing myself to the world through it.

I provided you access. Heck, I wanted you to see it. I wanted you to see me.

But, it seems that you don't like these kind of things. It's childlike, I know. Believe me, I know. But I just wanted you to see me the way I see myself. Because we're so different, you and I. That difference is what makes us perfect and I adore it. I love it. But sometimes I feel like that difference might lead to something else.

I'm a disaster. And I'm afraid that slowly, without us even noticing it, I'm already destroying the one great thing I have had in this lifetime because of me being like this.

Because of what I actually am.